Last night was our second baby class and I left class crying, no not crying SOBBING! First off, let me say that today is my birthday (the big 2-9) but this isn't a birthday post (well sorta). So let me backtrack a few days...
Saturday night we went to the Annual Fair Dinner Auction. Luckily, despite what DH wanted to spend, we got out of there spending only about $50 on raffle tickets and sausage that is in the freezer. However, DH took advantage of the all you can drink.
Sunday morning was supposed to be my day for my birthday. I wanted to run some errands and grab lunch, pretty low key. I woke up and went to get us donuts for breakfast. Around 10am, I finally told him I was leaving without him to which he finally got moving only to be super crabby. So we headed to Babies-R-Us and bought a crib mattress (I wanted to go there). Then we went to Costco (DH's choice) and grocery shopped. I had a free entree at First Watch but because we got such a late start, we missed eating there by 30 minutes because they were closed so we headed to Buffalo Wild Wings...where I paid. Then we went to the movies (I was so exhausted I just wanted to go home) and saw DH's movie choice. So that was Sunday...
Sunday night I also heard about the D-Tap shot and found out that anyone that's going to be around the baby during the first 2 months should be current on this shot. DH freaked out saying it was all government regulated and blah blah blah. When I told him that my favorite fellow agreed, he said he'd look into it. When we head to class Monday night, that was an entire topic that we discussed! My parents and his mom already have their shots scheduled. What do you want to bet that DH won't ever get his?
Anyway, we tour the hospital and during a Q&A, his phone vibrates and he walks away from the group to go answer it. I thought that was super rude, he thought it was fine since he left the group. We head back to the room and go over more topics including different labor positions. The teacher stopped and our convo:
Teacher: Can you feel the difference?
Me: I can feel him pushing and the pressure but I don't really feel any difference.
Teacher: Oh, probably because you aren't that far along.
Me: I'm 31 weeks (second due in class).
Teacher: Oh, you're just not showing that much.
And that my friends was the line that broke me. I'm SUPER sensitive about my lack of bump despite the doctor telling me I'm okay. I'm even MORE sensitive than I was since I was measuring 29 instead of 30 last week. So at that point, on top of how DH had been acting, I was done. I felt like I shouldn't be in the class, that she felt that way so I was closed off. FYI-I know she meant NOTHING by it but come on, pregnancy hormones, crabby husband and already worried about it all added up.
We then had breathing exercises. Most of the husbands were right behind the wives rubbing their backs. My husband? He was laid out on the floor behind me rubbing my back with one hand. That with the comment and everything else sent me into tears. Big, fat, crocodile tears started rolling down my cheeks during the breathing and I didn't have long sleeves or a Kleenex or anything to wipe them away. This happened for about 10 minutes then we had to stand up and try a labor position. I faced the wall in hopes that I could get myself under control but no, it was worst. I breathed in and it was like the gasping for air because I'm crying and then snot running out of my nose; people I was a hot mess! So I decided I'd leave the room and head to the bathroom. Of course, right when I did the teacher said the breathing exercise was over and the whole class turned around to see me sobbing. DH looked at me totally oblivious to me having been crying and said, "What?"
I went to the bathroom and tried to get myself together but the tears were STILL coming. I walked out and surprisingly DH had followed me out to find out what was wrong. I just told him I didn't want to talk about it because I knew he'd think I was stupid for getting upset about her comment and I knew he'd disagree that he'd been rude. The teacher came out to check on me and I told her I was okay. Luckily, when we headed back in, class was over. We got in the car and rode home in silence, me crying the entire time. Then I felt bad because we'd paid for the class, we need to practice the breathing and I made us miss it. So that's my story about how I had a breakdown at Class #2 and for the next two classes, I'll be known as the crier....awesome.
Oh and it's now 2:30pm on my birthday and my husband has yet to tell me happy birthday...
Benton and Emery's first birthday party!
10 years ago
